As a young child I moaned at my mother for the fact I was an only child and was the only one of my friends not to have a brother or sister, I can't imagine that must have been easy for her to hear. I was still young when she told me about Scott and some years later she had his birth certificate framed and displayed alongside our family photos so he is still a part of our family.
I told my Mum that everything happens for a reason (very philosophical of me at a young age!) and that had he survived I wouldn't be here. There would only be 16 months between us and as she didn't fall pregnant easily with me I think that she would have left a longer gap before really trying for number 2 (especially having one myself now!) I don't doubt that given the choice she would have had more than one child but the second child would have been born at a different time, therefore meeting different people throughout life and having different experiences and therefore not being me.
Several years ago I wrote this poem, which I had framed on my bedroom wall....
Scott, I thank you for giving me life,
I will be all that I can be, a good mother and wife.
I will have my career and be a success,
I owe that to you, and I'll give you the best.
I will be happy for you in all that I do,
And when I am sad you will carry me through.
I will be the success that you would have been,
I will fight, I'll be strong, I will reach that dream.
I can do anything, I can be the best,
I'll do that for you, you deserve nothing less.
Linking up to Wednesday Words