Wednesday, 8 February 2012

Not all sunshine and flowers

I read somewhere the other day (no idea where now. so let me know if it was you and I'll mention it!) an article which asked if some 'Mum bloggers' were projecting an unrealistic picture of parenthood.

Well, yeah more than likely I'd say!   Of course there are many very honest blogs out there talking about the less fun side of parenting, and important issues such as depression and special needs but you could easily mistake many more for living a perfect life...  gorgeous children, perfect Mum's crafting with their children and others creating lovely home cooked meals every day.

From reading previous comments on my blog it occurred to me that people sometimes see a different view to reality.... living the high life in the sun?    When I started this blog I didn't deliberately set out to only blog about the good stuff but as time went on it's kind of what happened, plus the fact it cheers me up more to write about the nice things!
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I know a lot of people read this now and many that I know in 'real life' so I've tried to stay away from the moans, in fact it took me till last month to write my first 'moany' post. and I even toned that down!

I've been debating this post for a while but realised its my party blog and I'll cry whinge if I want to.  So get the kettle on!

As you may know, Aaron lost his job back in August. We've been looking for work now for many months and it appears there is none to be found. Maybe 5 or 6 jobs found to apply for, with no response and one (unsuccessful) interview in 5 months.  He is now looking further afield and has applied (still with no response) for jobs in Dubai and the Middle East.  It would be the answer to our problems if he got one of those, although it might throw up a few more as it would mean me staying here and him working in a different country.

Having paid his social insurance payments since starting work, Aaron is entitled to unemployment benefit, this does however only last for 6 months so we are fast approaching this time now. My parents have been and continue to be amazing and are currently supporting us but I hate having to do this to them and I know it cannot continue. I really don't know what we will have to do, Aaron maintains that we will not HAVE to go back to the UK, which is more than fine by me. It's one of the last things I want to do and I don't know that it would even help us that much.

Our bills seem to be thundering through the door at once, and my car is making some worrying noises.

Aaron's car has been off the road for over a year now and in the garage for most of that time as they fix it slowly in their typical Cyprus way!

I really need to go to the dentist, but am putting it off as I know its going to cost me!

I feel like I haven't been warm for months - yes I know, sunny Cyprus but it's bloody freezing indoors. I spend every day in 3 or 4 layers of clothes and spend the evenings under a duvet. We have had the heating on as little as possible and have still been hit with a bill for over 500 euros for 3 months!  I know it won't be long at all until the days warm up and as soon as that happens everything will seem easier though.

I won't even start on how much I need a hair cut, or how I no longer have a pair of jeans to fit and one of my two decent pairs of leggings has a hole in them as they are not essential things and I'm trying to forget how I thought they once were.

I'm trying to be positive  (yep, positive we are stuffed!) and I'm sure I'll get moaned at for writing this post but by not writing it, I felt like it was stopping me writing anything else!  I'll stop now before I remember there are more things to moan about.



Normal service will be resumed shortly and I'll be back to depressing you all with sunny beach photos.....

18 comments:

  1. Huge hug coming your way.
    Do you feel better after writing this? Even just a tiny bit?
    I agree that its good to be realistic and I applaud you for writing this. I think people in general assume that when people move abroad that its the holiday lifestyle. Days spent by the beach/pool, night times sat by a bar eating Tapas and drinking cocktails. Easy to get a job because of all the bar work/rep work and everything is cheap.
    I really hope life picks up for you all soon and some luck is thrown your way xx

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  2. hun, i know exactly what you are going through and it certainly isnt easy but you will get through it one way or another, you will eventually turn the corner......i really hope you have some luck your way soon and just remember youve got a lot of good things happening like growing a little brother or sister for Leo xx

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  3. Is there likely to be more work when it gets warmer? Everything seems better when it's warmer anyway. Money worries are so difficult because they cause lots of tensions too. Moneys a bit tight for us, now I've been on maternity leave for two years! I got told off by the hubby today for giving the girls a whole apple instead of chopping one up for them to share! We've never argued about money before.

    Anyway, I think you have every right to have a moan and it's your blog, if it helps you to get it off your chest then go for it!  I'm sure everyone reading this will appreciate your honesty. 

    Thanks for linking up and a steaming cup of tea for you. 

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  4. So sorry to hear you're having a tough time. I'm sure things will get better for you soon. Sending you huge hugs x x x

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  5. MidlifeSinglemum9 October 2012 at 20:27

    Firstly, I think you are right about the perfect mummy bloggers - even when some of them have a moan it's not about anything big. I know how much of a worry it is to be nearing the end of your income, I am also hurtling to the end of my savings and not bringing in nearly enough. The only thing i can think of to say is that things have a habit of turning out in the end. Maybe from Easter there'll be somethng in the tourist industry or people will want their homes decorated while the weather is warmer. Good luck xxx

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  6. I get what you mean entirely, I'm in my partners manky old jumper with no heating on and freezing half to death to save on electricity while wearing a pair of £5 fake ugg boots from Primarni that have so many holes in the soles they practically talk but I don't want to replace them as I can't justify the expense - and my partner has a job! The expat lifestyle isn't as glam as people seem to imagine eh! I hope your man gets a job soon and things start to look up for you x

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  7. Oh Em - i don't know what i can say! i send you a massive (hug) and i just hope Aaron soon gets a job. pone in Dubai would be perfect as he would earn so much money which would be great for you all.  how long until things start to warm up? 
    i had a load of maternity clothes but gave them away - what a shame cos I could have sent them over to you instead! 
    i think its great that you have written all this down - well done you cos it must have taken a lot of put it all into coherent words. xxx

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  8. I think you'll find this was worth while posting. When I found things got tough last year, I couldn't face writing about it...which stopped me from writing about anything else.  My blog ended up in an unintentional hiatus, when really it could have been so therapeutic.

    Sorry to hear things are so difficult, I'll keep my fingers crosses that Aaron finds something soon!

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  9. I do feel it's been stopping me writing anything else as it felt a bit forced, I've always written whatever pops into my head up till now.  Thank you for your comment

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  10. Thanks hun..... it should start getting a bit warmer next month. The summer season starts in May but April can often be very nice too.    So many people have said to me lately they have just got rid of maternity clothes, one was my friend who gave some away last week without thinking!

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  11. There is likely to be a bit more work as it gets warmer, there are so many people struggling at the moment as there are so many things closed for the winter. The weather will improve soon and then things should hopefully pick up.   

    Had to smile about you getting told off about the apple though - I told hubby off for having a sausage and bacon sandwich when he should just have one or the other to save some for later!

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  12. Yep, no-one gets the fact that it's not all cocktails by the pool do they and it does get cold!

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  13. I'm sure he can find something when the season starts even if it has to be 2 jobs  ( I don't think one in the tourist industry would pay the bills)    You're right though, everything does seem to work out in the end, it always does eventually doesn't it. 

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  14. Thanks hun, I'm sure we will sooner or later, its just working out how to find the bloody corner!   Am sure it will appear when it warms up a bit   :)

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  15. Thank you very much xxx

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  16. Sorry to hear how tough things are. I hope it has been some therapy to write about it and share. I can offer nothing more than a virtual hug and the hope that things improve for you. Keep writing as you need to. xx

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  17. Oh Em, sorry that things are not going too well for you at the moment.  I have central heating in my house here in Spain, if I ran it 24/7 like I used to in England I would probably end up paying about €400 pr month.  I cannot afford to put it on.  I just run it once a month to stop it seizing up!!!

    It is currently 18° in my sitting room, which sounds quite warm if you are in the UK, but to me (I've lived here 10 years now) it is so, so cold.  I often find myself wearing scarfs and bodywarmers in the house!!  Luckily we do have a log burner and a cheap supply of logs, so it's not too bad.  But the stone/tiled floors everywhere OMG, and to think of showering either first thing in the morning or last thing at night forget about it - just before or after lunch.

    Anyway, stay snuggled beneath you duvet and hope that Aaron finds work soon. xx

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  18. It still amazes me that 18deg feels so cold - we used to set our heating in the UK to 19 or 20!

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